5 Financial Red Flags in a Relationship
Check out these financial red flags before you go deeper into your relationship. If you don’t look at these signs, it may be bad for your financial well-being and sanity.
1. He avoids paying the check when we go out to dinner.
As gay men, someone usually picks up the bill and then the next time, your date or future partner picks it up the next time. If he continually avoids picking up the tab or makes excuses why he cannot pay for at least his share, you may want to pause for a moment and ask yourself, do you really want to be with this guy? Not only does the habit suggest you’re falling for someone who can’t handle money responsibly, there’s also evidence it can hurt you in the wallet long-term. It looks like there will be many things besides dinner that you will be paying for. It’s a respect thing, don’t you think?
2. He Spends Like a Drunken Sailor
He may be that kind of guy that will by a round of drinks for the whole bar and not think anything about it. Having keen interest on the latest fashions and gadgets is great but does he have to buy them all? Spending as though money is no object can be a huge warning sign. How about if he spends it on you? It’s even better, or is it? Not too fast! Think about it. Is he buying you? Does he have anything else to offer than throwing money around ? Will he buy some other guy and return you? If he lives pay check to paycheck, it’s even more of a problem.
3. He’s Frequently Unemployed
It can happen to anyone. You lose a job but if it is a serial situation…Where he changes jobs every 90 days ( probationary period) or every year…it will cause stress and financial instability.
First, let’s use some common sense: A person that continually is unemployed maybe unstable in his relationship. He may lack responsibility and a work ethic. He may not get along with others. He might do the same to you and brush the dust off his shoes and walk off because of something you said or did instead of putting the work into making a relationship .
4. He doesn’t want to talk about finances.
Is there something that he is hiding or doesn’t want you to know about? In a relationship, one wants to be an open book so you can be in a committed relationship. If you plan on buying a house together, or adopt children , etc. you must know about his financial well-being.
5. He uses Pay Day Loans like a Savings account. He is always burrowing from someone.
People avoid him because they know he is a mooch. It damages the dynamics of family and friends, if they know your boyfriend, will ask “for a favor” What is even worse, is he forgets to pay them back and now you’re in the middle of it. The mental stress of it all may drain you.
What You Can Do? It’s time to think about your relationship and address this difficult topic before you go any further in the relationship. In this case, it’s worth it to have a frank talk, and tell him how you feel and what are his plans in changing his money behavior so you can move into a long-term relationship or avoid one all together.
Have you dated someone who was a financial red flag? If so, were you able to cope —and what happened? Please leave comments below.
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